Extreme Motorcycling

I turn on NBC-TV this afternoon, and enter the world of Extreme Motorcycling.  I wonder:  how do you get involved in this sport?

Step 1.  A friend says, “I got a new motorcycle.  I’ll give you a ride.  Hop on!”

Step 2.  “That was fun.  I gotta get my own motorcycle.”

Step 3.  You ride your new motorcycle around town.  You take some turns faster than you should, and don’t fall off.  You take more turns, and make them faster and faster.

Step 4.  You ride on the sidewalk and you jump the curb, like you might on a bike.  That was fun.

Step 5.  You realize that if you lean back and pull, you can lift your front wheel off the ground.  You see if you can jump up onto the curb.  You can.

Step 6.  You take your motorcycle off the road, and try it cross country.  That turns out to be fun, too.

Step 7.  There is a little rise up ahead.  You ride towards it and up it.  When you get to the top of the rise, you leave the ground.  You are a foot into the air, and don’t land again for at least 2 seconds.  You don’t fall.

Step 8.  You pass an official extreme motorcycle course, and ride on in.  There is a ramp.  It looks like fun, and you remember the thrill of your 2 second flight.  You head towards it.

Step 9.  You ride up the ramp.  All of a sudden you seem to be, not 2, but 50, feet in the air.  “What the hell”, you say.  You do a double back flip on the cycle and, when the cycle is heading down to earth, you decide to do a handstand on the seat.  You live through it.

Step 10.  “That was a kick” you say, followed by “I didn’t get killed.  Piece of cake.”

Step 11.  You decide you will keep doing those stunts until you break your neck.

Step 12.   You break your neck.

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